When to Decide...

[Chowmia]

My 10 month old Joey suffers from bilateral elbow dysplasia, bilateral OCD and the growth plates have separated. We were told by 3 doctors, our vet and 2 specialists that he is a poor surgical candidate because of the complexity of all the ortho issues. He has had a hard time getting up and walking since he was 4 months of age. And with his front legs being so painful he naturally favors them, to the point where he has torn the ACL in his right rear leg. We have been managing him medically for the last 6 months, knowing too well that a decision has to be made concerning his quality of life at some point. I have been hoping and praying that the decision would come much later. That the supplements we have tried on him will curb the gradual deterioration of his elbow and knee joints. But over the course of this last week he has grown significantly worse. He can't get up most of the time without one of us bodily lifting him onto his feet. He walks like a very old man. I have had to dose him with the Tramadol more than ever, just to make him a little more comfortable.
This puppy has the biggest heart I have ever loved in any dog. Knows no stranger, his tail is always wagging. Even when he is hurting he knows we are trying to help him, his tail wags and wags. I am being selfish I know, but it is so hard to let him go. How many of you have said goodbye to a beloved Chow and had the remains cremated. Bizare question I am sure, but it Almost makes it a little easier for me that when the day comes to say goodbye, I won't be leaving him behind, but can take a part of him with me. I am not weird (I don't think!) just love this baby so very much...
Thanks,
Karen

[Victory]

I have had four of mine cremated and I have their ashes when/if I have a house with my own garden I will build a little shrine for them all...on the other hand I may specifiy their ashes be interred with mine....I don't consider it weird; I consider it a duty to honor them in this way.

[mrstu]

I have had to do this, make a decision for my little Mrs. Tu -- she was 17 years old and really my soul. It was the most difficult thing I ever had to do but I will tell you that I looked at her in her eyes and she told me it was time. She was hanging on in pain for me and the vet told me that she would not make it easy on me and pass naturally.. I did have her cremated and I have her ashes with me. The vet also made a paw print for me so I have that as well plus I cut some of her hair so I have that as well. You will know when it is the right time, I think you will instinctively know. My heart goes out to you.

[chowkidz]

In my mind this is the only bad thing about being owned by a chowchow. Having to make that choice. We had to have our first chowmix (bear)put down at 6yrs and then we had a 6 month old pup (nala) die 6 months after that. Bear we understood why, Nala to this day (it's been 10yrs) we still don't understand why. They were both creamated and we have their ashes on our mantel. I also have a charm on my necklace w/ Nala's ashes that i wear everyday. That way she still gets to go places with us. All the furkidz we are blessed to have will be creamated when it's their turn to cross over and then when it's our turn they will go with us. I see no weirdness in your post just a loving caring soul. It is so sad to see anyone so young to be in so much pain.

[Chowmia]

I truly appreciat all of the responses thus far and the positive support. Chowkidz, I cried at the thought of you wearing a little bit of one of your beloved Chows around your neck so she could go places with you. I would Love to do the same for Joey. As he has never really been able to go with us as our other 2 Chows have, it would be wonderful to think that Joey can finally not be left behind. Do you use a locket or is it a special piece of jewelery crafted specifically?
Karen

[Jeff&Peks]

I can't answer when to decide because apparently I can't make that decision and hope I never have to do it again but I had Onyx cremated, I'm waiting now to hear from the cremation place when to pick up her ashes, after its done they return it to the vet for you to pick up.. Cremating your pet and bringing it home isn't weird millions of people do it there's nothing strange or weird about it so I would say definitely have it done. Having jewelry made is also and excellent idea I won't do it with Onyx but when its Pekoe's time I thought about having one of her canine teeth pulled cleaned up and have a necklace made with it, kind of like they do with a sharks tooth.

Here is a link to the Crematory I am using its probably to far from you but it will give you an idea with what to do and a sample of all the urns they offer. The price is around $250 depending on the size of the Pet then the price of what ever Urn you pick. there is an urn included in the cremation price but they offer others at an additional price.

http://www.calpet.com/

[chowkidz]

Every time i put my necklace on I tell her we love her and she gets to go certain places the other kidz don't. See your not weird. I think we can do an entire post on what one person might think is weird and someone else does it everyday. If i was thinking clearly 10 years ago i would be selling these on the side now. My husband and I must have looked for a couple of weeks without any luck. Then i called a jeweler about having one made....sure for $600! Then we apparently inhaled too many fumes from cleaning supplies or something and thought about trying to empty the powder out of a bullet and resealing that ......really we are not that redneckish, just getting desperate. Then one day we were at the mall in Baltimore walking around and there was a stand in the center selling cheap necklaces w/ a charm that had rice and wine in it.. we bought an empty charm and filled it. It was amazing how that actually picked me up. I have lost count of how many people have asked where they can get one. I think they are easier to find now.

[CoraP.]

I am so sorry to hear this, Karen. Joey sounds like such a sweetheart. It is an awful decision to make and nobody wants to have to make it. If only we didn't have to... I had my first chowmix, Bear cremated. I thought I would eventually bury his ashes, but I haven't been able to yet (after almost 4 years), and probably never will. I have the ashes in a square container that has a place on all sides and the top for a picture. There is a picture of him in each spot. I imagine someday I will have him buried with me since I can't seem to put the ashes in the ground. I see nothing weird about it. My goodness, some people have Grandpa in an urn on their mantel! Nothing wrong with it at all.

[Laura]

I had my beloved Kody cremated almost one year ago. Before I had to let him go I collected hair and paw prints and after he was gone I made a shadowbox with pictures, his collar, the hair, paw print, etc. I chose to bury his ashes beside a little tree in our yard. I have since planted flowers all around and there is a small headstone. When/if we move he will come with us. I couldn't bring myself to keep the ashes on the mantel or somewhere because of my own reaction when I received them. We buried them that same day. Many people choose to keep them out though. It's a personal choice and not a thing wrong with either decision.
I can't imagine having to make this decision for such a young animal. Kody was 14 and a half and I still haven't recovered. My heart goes out to you and your baby.

[kiwani]

... And with his front legs being so painful he naturally favors them, to the point where he has torn the ACL in his right rear leg.

It's heartbreaking just reading about Joey's condition. Have the doctors mentioned that *total* elbow joint replacements are available for
dogs? There's also a new technique for repairing ligaments. This link below concerning elbow replacement is from 2002. You might also consider joining the canine orthopedic group at yahoo 'orthodogs'.

All best wishes for Joey...

http://www.public.iastate.edu/~nscentra ... mius.shtml

[chowchowdaddy]

When we took our first chow, Chia, to the vet on that fateful day for what we hoped and prayed was something routine, it turned out it wasn't. Her cancer had apparently spread throughout her body and, while he assured us he didn't think she was in any pain but that she soon would be, we made the decision to have her put to sleep (an awful euphemism, isn't it?) right then. We had her cremated and, eventually, placed her ashes into an antique Tiffany bronze urn that we had bought at an auction in New York the prior year (NOT for that purpose). We debated about spreading them in our back yard (where she loved to spend hours and hours lying under one of the window boxes filled with flowers) or burying them, but decided to keep the ashes in the urn so that we could take them with us wherever we might eventually end up. As we will now do for Emperor Ming and Tempest...

So, no, none of us think you're silly or stupid or anything else. But, and I hate to second guess and question, have you tried all of the other medical options for a chowling so young...

[ChowLady]

Its never a easy thing to do is make the choice for a loving chow baby when is the right time to let go. Have you tried Cartrophen to help with the joints as I used that on one of my chows and it gave me a extra 3 years with her. Just a thought. I had to make the choice of letting Catbalou go on 30th December 07, and I had her cremated and she sits on my mantel in a lovely urn and a big photo of her, with a crystal angel, and then I had to make the choice of letting Teisha go on 8th July 08, I have had her cremated and just waiting for her return and she will also sit on the mantel next to Catbalou. You and your lovely chow baby are in my thoughts and prayers.
Kathy

[Chowmia]

I am so touched by all of the responses and the devotion all of you show to your lovely Chows. It is a warm feeling to know that there are so many out there like my family that feel such a connection to our chowdren.
In answer to those who have thoughtfully offered advice...Joey started at 4 months showing signs of pain and a change in his gait, in all of the mannerisms of front end movement. We had x-rays taken of both elbows and his hips and knees. Our vet knew before the x=rays that there were some serious issues with the elbows just with the clinical exam and seeing how he moves. The x-rays were then sent to an Ortho specialist who sent them to another specialst who was more knowledgable about the elbow joint and surgeries that may benefit our boy. We were told that because the growth plate was separated from the bone it became a different problem on top of the ED and OCD. Oh they did offer to try to surgically correct some of the issues with the broken cartilage (from the OCD). However with a poor prognosis for Joey and at a projected cost of $8,000 for bilateral repair, (OCD only) we opted to treat for pain and try to make him comfortable. We have tried Rimadyl and another second generation to it (can not remember the name off hand) And Deremax(sp). None did anything for him. I mean Nothing. So we are now using natural supplements, Cosequin DS and Nupro Joint formua. The Cosequin did nothing after almost 7 weeks, then we went to the Nupro. That seemed to be the only thing that has given a touch of relief. We give Tramdol on bad days.
He is a product of very poor breeding, too much line breeding with a genetic pool that is thick with ED and other health issues. (Found out too late). BUT, the breeder wins a lot in the breed ring, isn't that what it is all about? NOT!
Thank you all again.

[pfordeb]

Aw, poor baby. How are his spirits? That is when we knew it was time for Sullivan, well, she let us know. Keep us posted.

[Sydney]

Chowmia:

My heart goes out to you and your Joey. You'll know when it's time to let him go. The pain of having to make a decision like yours is so painful especially when you think that a young pup should have his whole life ahead of him. My last chowgirl is in my china cabinet and will be with us always.

Can you tell us who the breeder is? If it were me, I would be so angry and would want others to know so they can avoid such a low-life.

Syd

[MFOSSS]

ITS ALWAYS A HARD CHOICE , BOSKO PASSED WITHIN MINUTES , WITH NO WARNING . IT HURT MORE THAN WORDS CAN EXPRESS . KOKOA DIED IN MY ARMS AFTER GIVING HIM EVERY TREATMENT KNOWN , BUT DID I DO THIS FOR LOVE OF HIM OR NOT BEING ABLE TO LET GO . I PRAY THAT THE EXTRA FEW DAYS I GOT TO SAY GOODBYE WHERE NOT ONES THAT MADE HIM SUFFER . IT MADE US HURT THE SAME , WE NEVER WILL KNOW IF WE MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE . DO WHAT YOUR HEART SAYS , WITH EVERY DECISION YOU MAY HAVE TO MAKE .

[jacqui]

Karen,reading your post was heartbreaking .it must be so sad to watch him struggle each day
I too,got a baby chow from a 'good breeder' he had a congenital heart problem.he had heart surgery but died at 16 months old
for me there was no decsion.but he was with me for 1 yr and 2 weeks.I loved him so much and he too was always so happy like your Joey.
I always have my chows cremated and I have a shrine for them with their urns,pictures and angels.I want them with me always.
please keep us posted and I'll be thinking of you both.

[Dogdad]

My heart is breaking for you two. It is so hard to let go. I have had the last few furkids that have passed cremated and are on the mantel with their pictures. When I die, I want us all scattered together,or if I have to be buried, then buried together. I don't think it is wierd in the least. They are our children.

David

[Chowmia]

Chowmia:

My heart goes out to you and your Joey. You'll know when it's time to let him go. The pain of having to make a decision like yours is so painful especially when you think that a young pup should have his whole life ahead of him. My last chowgirl is in my china cabinet and will be with us always.

Can you tell us who the breeder is? If it were me, I would be so angry and would want others to know so they can avoid such a low-life.

Syd

The breeder is Jane Weiss of Shanghai Chows. Even 2 months ago I would have thought twice before posting her name. But now as we have traveled through the course of time, these last 8 weeks we have seen Joey become more and more crippled. And I do feel anger at her and people like her that have no care regarding what they are producing. Not for the heartbreak the owners suffer through, but more importantly what these innocents must face in the life they did not ask for. But being the wonderful beings they are, they face all obstacles and adversity with love in their hearts for us, and pride. We can and I think do learn a lot from our Chows. Especially the sick ones.

[chow fancier]

Oh, I feel for you. I read your post and tears ran down my face. I am so sorry that you are in this place. Shame on the breeder who breeds without regard to health. (Ok, I know it is not my place to judge but they deserve a suitable punishment, drawn and quartered maybe?).

I've had to make the decision to euthanize 2 chows and it is heart wrenching. It was easier with Chana because she stopped eating and exploratory surgery found an inoperable tumor. The vet called me from the operating room and we let her go then, sedated and in no pain.

Tasha deteriorated gradually, eventually determined that she had a brain tumor and would only get worse. But because the deterioration was gradual, it was hard to draw the line, when was her quality of life so reduced that it would be kinder to let her go than to keep her with me? When I thought it might be time, I made an appointment with our vet and the three of us sat on the floor and talked about the situation. When I made up my mind, I held Tasha as she was injected and bawled as she left me. Tears ran down the vets face as well. The vet really made it as easy as it could be but it was still the hardest decision I have ever made and the one I have second guessed the most. And both of mine were 13 when the time came. I can't imagine having to make the decision for a chowling.

God bless you for caring for your baby through all this and for considering his quality of life as the deciding factor.

[pfordeb]

As Chow Fancier so poignantly described, you will hopefully know when the time comes. Sullivan helped us decide. I would just weigh what we've all told you, plus your vet, and anyone you know who has pets. I'm so sorry this poor baby has suffered and you as well.

[fillyok]

This is one of those subjects that makes me cry. I only hope that when/if I have to make such a heart-wrenching decision I can make the right one. The one that benefits my furkid (not me). My mom always told me that we couldn't get any more pets when we lost one because I never handled their deaths well. I hope I can handle it when mine find it's their time to cross the bridge. I've already looked into crematories here in San Antonio (and bookmarked them) so I won't have to go through that process of searching when the time comes. I'll be cremated too and hopefully someone will scatter all of us together somewhere nice.

There's a company that makes gems out of cremains. I saw a small article in Best Friends' magazine. http://www.lifegem.com/secondary/LGPrices2006.aspx

[Jeff&Peks]

All I can say is when it comes time to make that decision make sure its your decision and gut feeling and not influenced by People around you. With Onyx I went against my principles and let other people change my mind. My first decision was to save her and do the surgery, Had it not been for the vet telling me to take a few minutes my decision wouldn't have been changed. I should have given Onyx a chance and worried about what might happen later when it happened. I'm not upset about it or torturing myself over it I made the decision and its over As the days have passed and I've had time to think I F'ed up big time with Onyx and getting others involved.

I was just giving my opinion about making the decision no need for anyone to post about my decision right or wrong and highjacking this thread.

[Chowmia]

Jeff,
I am so sorry you lost Onyx. In some ways I think it is so much more difficult and painful when you lose a pet in the manner you did. Sudden, without any time to prepare for the loss. It is indeed traumatic. At least with Joey I do have time to prepare for the inevitable. I think the support and suggestions of everyone who has responded to my original post is reflective of the compassion and care we all share. I am very grateful that I have this forum to go to for the answers and support I have received. Jeff, time does heal. And I hope and pray that for you time also relieves some of the burden you carry regarding your decision concerning Onyx.
All the Best,
Karen

[Glitterbug]

(((Karen)))
I lost my beloved 10 year old chow chow "Keena" to lymphoma on 1/18/08. My life has not been the same since. I'm not married and don't have kids so she was my everything. I had her put to sleep at my house and had her cremated. The place that did it is amazing. They are so kind and compassionate. I don't know where you live but I would recommend cremation. Keena is next to me at night. I also got a charm neclace and had some of her ashes put inside.
Loosing her crushed my faith and I will never be the same. So I feel your pain!!
I actually just found this website tonight and chose to sign up. Your post is the first one I read. So maybe it was meant to be I join tonight. I only hope I made you feel a little better.
Hugs
Shawna

Here is Keena's dogster telling her story.
http://www.dogster.com/dogs/717346