Aggression towards family member

[Bear's Mom]

My 3 yr old Chow/Shepard mix just doesn't like my 17 yr old daughter. He has teased him from the time I got him and states that she just doesn't like him, for what reason she says she doesn't know. I think he knows/senses this too. Needless to say, he's went after her, growling, knocked her down once and was putting his teeth on her, even biting, and another time she went to hand me the phone and Bear growled and then went after her, biting her on the foot and drawing blood. He was at my feet and I suppose he thought she was coming after me to hurt me. He is VERY protective of me and has growled and lunged at others that came near me. I don't know if I have encouraged this behavior somehow, although I don't know how, but it is scaring me where my daughter is concerened. Outsiders I do warn when they come in to not look at him, or pay any attention to him whatsoever...but they seem to never listen. WHY???? Anyway, I know if my daughter would just quit teasing/picking on him it might get better, but things are already set this way and I don't think she wants to change. I don't know why she dislikes him, it might be that before Bear I had another chow/shepard mix, 15 1/2 years old, and she resents Bear cuz she thinks I got Bear to take Conan's place. No dog will ever take his place, but I needed another dog to love and Bear just came into my life. Can anyone give me any advice? This is getting crazy. Thanks.

[KathrynH]

That teasing and picking on him is probably the root of the problem. She has GOT to stop, or something worse could happen. He is reacting to that teasing, just like anyone would react to constant teasing and picking on.

[TJordan]

It is not just the behavior of your daughter causing problems. But her attitude toward the chow. HE can sense she doesn't like him and he is showing her the same respect she is showing him. Until her attitude and behavior change his won't. She doesn't have to like him, but she will have to respect his space and leave him alone. Although I can't imagine anyone not liking a chow or chow mix!!

[Bear's Mom]

I think she has something against him cuz he's not Conan, my last chow mix. I love Bear very much and that bothers her for some reason. Could she be jealous cuz I love this dog so much? I just don't know how to make her stop, I've talked to her....I will NOT get rid of my dog, people have said that to me. No way. He gets along fine with my hubby and my son, who never teases or picks on him. Now if I'm in bed, or just in my bedroom, he growls when anyone tries to come in. He loves his mom.

[mommashows]

Be careful. He is protecting you. He needs to know you are in charge and you will protect him. He is taking ownership of you and that spells trouble.

Carol from Canada

[CoraP.]

I agree that your daughter needs to stop the picking and teasing. No, she doesn't have to like him, but she should be old enough to understand that she is causing a lot of the problem and she needs to ignore him if she doesn't like him. How long has Conan been gone? Maybe she needs help working through his loss. It can be very difficult to lose one so special.

[Bear's Mom]

Conan died in May of 2005 and I found Bear about 3 months or so later. I agree he's trying to own me somehow...and I do spoil him. I need to work on that. Thanks everyone for helping me.

[Lisa_D]

I agree, your daughter needs to stop teasing him. It could become a situation that could be very bad. Now that there is this history it could take a long time for Bear to be comfortable around your daughter. PLease be careful because Bear has given you all the warning signs that he is fed up with the teasing and this could end up being a very ugly situation. Please stress the importance to your daughter that she could become seriously injured and the need to come to a truce with him.

[Bear's Mom]

She's 17 so its hard to get anything into her hard head...but I will talk to her more. I don't remember being like that when I was her age. I loved all animals. Even if they didn't like me, I respected them.

[Lisa_D]

I know, I had 7 of them!!! They can be hardheaded! But they did know their limit with the animals. You would think it would have scared your daughter enough to not tease her anymore when Bear did go after her??? I that it would have been enough for me!

[jacqui]

Chows can sense when someone doesn't like them.
when I got my first Chow,Chang my brother was going in the service.Chang and my brother never hit it off.when my brother got home from the service 4 years later he lived at home and it was hell.each night when he came home from work Chang would not let him in the house
me or my Dad would have to hold Chang so my brother could come in.I was always worried if Chang bit him that there would be big trouble.
my Dad was very ill and Chang would protect his room and would not let my brother in.Chang would let the nurse in but not my brother.
those were some very hard years.
if your daughter would even just ignore him that may work.

[Bear's Mom]

I tell her to. She's nice to him sometimes but as soon as he gets pissy when it comes to me, she starts all over being mean to him. What can I say, I love the dog, so he stays no matter what. Of course I love her, but she started this so....

[puppy love]

tough situation--you dog needs to know humans are the boss. it seems to me that you are chosing the dog here and the message being sent to Bear is that humans are second...this may be part of the problem. best of luck!

[Me & Tess]

Our daughter, Wendy was about 17 when Tess came into our life. Wendy’s dog was a little Ausie, hers since Wendy was 3 years old. We had Apache for thirteen years, until she passed away. Wendy didn’t want to accept Tess, didn’t tease her but ignored her, paid her no attention at all. When Wendy graduated from high school she got a part time job at Disneyland. She worked at the Emporium on Main Street. The bus to Disneyland ran directly a block away from our house and dropped her off at Disneyland. Sometimes she would draw really late hours and the bus didn't run after midnight. Tess and I would "get Wendy." We'd load into my truck and hit Rosecrans to the 5 Freeway. At that point before we got on the on-ramp Tess would become very serious and put her paw on my arm. She would watch out for me. If she saw anyone strange she would growl, even if they were across the street. When we got to the Disneyland employee parking lot the attendant tried to talk to me and more than one time Tess would go over my lap growling and white teeth bared. She was a sight! She made sure I was safe. When I saw Wendy coming, I would say to Tess "here comes Wendy" and Tess would jump into the back seat of my king-cab. This is kinda funny, and almost never failed. When we were driving home Tess would make a poop (pass gas)! The smell would make Wendy gag! Wendy & I would then open the windows and yell "ahhhhhhhh - stinky - pew!!!! And we would be laughing!! I think that was Tess’ way of “getting back” at Wendy. Wendy is now 31. The last time she was up here (Montana), before she left she was sitting by Tess, head buried in her fur smelling her. She did really love Tess after all. We all have our childhood dogs/Chows, those will be ours forever. There are many "places" in our hearts for others. We as women, know this is true. Your daughter needs to realize this. I agree, things may get worse between your daughter and your Chowling if your daughter doesn‘t open her heart. A'int easy raising a teenage girl. Know the pain. Know the love. If your daughter will look deeply into your Chow in the eyes, she will seek forgiveness, and in turn your boy will accept. You are not to blame. I love Tess just as deeply as you love your Chow boy.

[Bear's Mom]

I know I do side with Bear more than I should, but my daughter never liked him from the start, when he was just a puppy. I don't know why she felt that way, and neither does she, but she won't quit agitating him. Just this morning she had to mess with him. She's never consistant with how she treats him. Nice one minute, mean the next. So now he doesn't trust her. She's 18 now and planning on what to do with her life....so I know she may move out one day soon...Bear isn't going anywhere. I get tired of the fighting with them, but I don't know what to do. I do let him know who is boss, but things have went this long, this far. I will try to be more forcefull with him, but what about a stubborn, hard-headed teen???