Grieving Forum

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Terrina Harris
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Grieving Forum

Post by Terrina Harris »

Does anyone know of a good forum for the loss of fur kids? I am looking for one that knows the loss is one of losing a family member. I don't want one that they consider the loss of just a dog or just a cat. I have had more then a few of my fur kids pass in the last year. I need to find other people that feel as deeply sadden as I do.
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PCC
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Re: Grieving Forum

Post by PCC »

I would think the Memorials and Prayers sub-forum would be the most appropriate place for grieving posts, but I wouldn't object if you wanted to post in the Community Discussions sub-forum. Surely just about everyone has lost a four-legged family member before. I lost my second to an accident...what I can say about Siu Mai's sudden passing is that while it was quite a painful loss, it subsequently brought Dim Sum into my life. I cherished Siu Mai, and now I cherish having Dim Sum.
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Terrina Harris
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Re: Grieving Forum

Post by Terrina Harris »

Has anyone here suggested that they have a sub forum called grieving here? It has been such a horrible year. On leap day Golden my 17 yr old persian (named in memory of my grandmother left us. That was exactly 4 yrs from when Cinnamon (my MiniMe) left us. Then April 4 my beautiful boy left us. My MiniMe sent him to me. I so fought loving him but he wouldn't give up. Then June 23rd Brandon (my BooBoo Bear, he was my BooBoo because He was suppose to be one of our rescues) left us. Then last month Ozzy (our other senior persian) left us. It really sucks.
I do have a new girl Sugar. A lady got her from a breeder when she was 78. Then 2 yrs later when Sugar and her Newfie got in a scuffle and the lady fell. So she dumped her at Animal control. When we picked Sugar up and knew she had already had found her family.
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wokman
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Re: Grieving Forum

Post by wokman »

You are a strong person, what you have been through is more than I could take. I hope your Sugar will bring you happiness for years to come. What kind of animal, dog or cat is Sugar?

There are brighter days ahead and you have memories of all the happiness and goodness your fur kids brought you.
Rest in peace, they are all together now in the forever after.
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Terrina Harris
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Re: Grieving Forum

Post by Terrina Harris »

She is a red Chow. She looks a lot like what my MiniMe looked like which is my photo. She will be 3 in Dec. Luckily the Animal Control officer loves Chows and called to see if we could take her.
It feels way more then I can handle. I am usually a strong person but this is just so much. That is why I asked about a grieving (support) forum. I knew they are all at the rainbow bridge healthy and pain free. I know that they all knew how very much I love them. They all knew how truely they "blessed" my life and I would not give up one second of the time we were together.
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Sirchow
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Re: Grieving Forum

Post by Sirchow »

I am so sorry for all you have been through. It is very hard when one of our furfriends leave us and you have had so much to manage. How ever much we know they are in a better place it still hurts to be left without them. The huge space they leave is so hard to bear.
I know someone who talked to the people who run this site and they do one to one counselling by email too.
http://rainbowsbridge.com/grief_support ... t_home.htm
I hope that you can find the way through the pain to an easier place. The one thing I do know about grief is there is no way but through it and sometimes the pain can be so intense it actually produces illness and symptoms. I think you are right to get some help with this.
Wishing you all the best.
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Siriol, Bramble, Izzie and Isla.
wokman
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Re: Grieving Forum

Post by wokman »

I hope Sir Chows friend can help you work through this. After I Posted you earlier today and read your response I thought to suggest one to one, face to face help. If there is no one in your family that is tuned in to a Pet owners needs maybe a spiritual advisor in your community can help or recommend a support group for people dealing with overwhelming loss. Your Veterinarian may be able to direct you to a support group or even help you through this.
You do have Sugar and she is very thankful to you and the Animal Control Officer for saving her.
I realize my first Post had the usual niceties and canned speech stuff but as of yet we cannot reach through the computers to give you a comforting hug or hold your hand when the pain of emptiness comes on. All the best to you and your new companion.
My late Kamie kept me busy and preoccupied with her baby Zoey(then ten year old baby) nursing her back to health after spinal surgery so she could walk again. The little Princess caused herself to relapse during early recovery when she insisted she was good to go, recovery was not so painless the second time through. She showed her dislike of the Clinic by doing a very Chow unlike act, number two in the lobby every visit back. :oops: :roll:
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Terrina Harris
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Re: Grieving Forum

Post by Terrina Harris »

Thank you everyone. Sir Chow I am going to use the info you gave me and see if the counciling by one of the persons that runs this site will help. Larry says he can tell that I am holding my feelings back from giving Sugar all of myself. You are right about sometimes the pain can be so intense that it is making me sick and if I am not crying I am feeling such horrible anger.
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Auddymay
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Re: Grieving Forum

Post by Auddymay »

Terrina, I am sorry to hear about your Ozzy. You are in a unique and terrible spot when it comes to grieving losses. Knowing you personally, I hear your pain when we talk about the furbabies that have past. Larry is right that you are holding back. I would say, though, that you are protecting yourself from the pain of inevitable loss. That is going to be hard for you because you are a rescuer, and you really do need some measure of protection from feeling such deep grief as often as you have been experiencing it. I hope you find the site you are looking for. I have a hard time going in the Chows we lost section here because it hurts so much every time. I am sure others feel that way as well.
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cherriemater
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Re: Grieving Forum

Post by cherriemater »

A year and a half later and I still hurt over our Kimba-girl. Mostly because it was my fault she passed. Recently, I was able to retrieve lost photos from my external hard drive ... which included Kimba pictures ... and the grief washed over me once again.

What Siriol says is correct ... you have to pass through the grief. You have to let it wash over you. Living here in the Great Lake State (Michigan) I learned at a very young age that if ever I experienced an undertow, the best way to survive it was to let it take you out until it released you. In other words, not to fight it. Same thing can be said for grief, whether it's the loss of a furbaby or another loved one. This site helped me to really feel the loss, to discuss it and gain a cathartic release and then to gain a new perspective.

Having been through it recently, I highly recommend posting a Tribute in the Memorials and Prayers section of this forum. Remembering and writing down all the good things is invaluable when the darkness of depression begins to take hold. Reading the caring comments of those with whom you have shared will also help to enlighten your heart. I have found so many kindred spirits on this site and think I would not be on this earth had I not opened up, both to let OUT the pain and to RECEIVE the love and support.

My heart aches for your pain.
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Joe and Marti Martin ... Chow Chow lovers for Life (RIP Kimba 06/03/2011)
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Sarahloo
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Re: Grieving Forum

Post by Sarahloo »

cherriemater wrote:Mostly because it was my fault she passed.
:shock:
It was? How?
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