Help with Grief
Moderator: chowadmin
Help with Grief
I lost my Lexi after 16years. I am totally overcome with grief. She was my best friend. Any words of encouragement to get thru this. She died with me petting her. The vet seems to think it was a stroke. Chow Chows are a special breed as everyone knows. Rodney- Ft. Myers, FL
Re: Help with Grief
I am so sorry for your loss. Please accept my sincere condolences.
Run free Lexi xx
Run free Lexi xx
Thank you Sweatpea
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Michael's Maggie May
- Rank 1
- Posts: 164
- Joined: Fri Jan 16, 2009 9:36 am
- Location: Athens,Ga
Re: Help with Grief
I lost my chinabear after 16 yrs also. I put her in the backyard with St. Francis watching over her.
It will take a little while to get over her for I cried like a baby. I missed her so much that I went looking for another just like her, It's been 2 yrs and I walk the new one by her grave asking chinabear to help me with this young one. Wait awhile and get another, it will make things easier.
It will take a little while to get over her for I cried like a baby. I missed her so much that I went looking for another just like her, It's been 2 yrs and I walk the new one by her grave asking chinabear to help me with this young one. Wait awhile and get another, it will make things easier.
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Judy Fox
- Rank 4
- Posts: 6320
- Joined: Wed Mar 02, 2005 9:49 am
- Location: Cheshire, On The Island.(But always wishing she was back home in Wales)
Re: Help with Grief
I am so sorry to hear your news. The grief is terrible and my advice is to let it take you.
You cannot stop it so go along with it.
However, when you need to cry and the ache in your heart is too much - cry - then when there is a lull, try to think of the good times. Try to smile a little then - then you will cry again - then you will remember some other lovely memory or funny incident so let yourself smile - then you will cry again - and so it will go on until one day you will find you are smiling more than you are crying. Please trust me - this works.
You will never forget her and she will always be part of your life and when she went, she took a little bit of your heart away with her - BUT - your heart can heal - it just needs a little help from you then you will have her completely in your heart again.
Here on The Island we always say our precious animals go to the Happy Hunting Grounds, where there is no more pain. The fawns gambol round the lions and the eagles sit in the trees with the cats and the owls doze with the mice. All is peace and St. Francis visits every day to see them.
You over The Pond introduced me to The Rainbow Bridge and I think it is a lovely and comforting belief that our chow chows cross the Rainbow Bridge to get to the Happy Hunting Grounds.
When the hurt gets less, and it will, please remember the words of that lovely old Hebrew proverb:-
Say not in grief she is no more but in thankfulness she was.
It will get better, I promise only it does not seem like that now.
![[:D]](./images/smilies/hugs.gif "Hugs")
You cannot stop it so go along with it.
However, when you need to cry and the ache in your heart is too much - cry - then when there is a lull, try to think of the good times. Try to smile a little then - then you will cry again - then you will remember some other lovely memory or funny incident so let yourself smile - then you will cry again - and so it will go on until one day you will find you are smiling more than you are crying. Please trust me - this works.
You will never forget her and she will always be part of your life and when she went, she took a little bit of your heart away with her - BUT - your heart can heal - it just needs a little help from you then you will have her completely in your heart again.
Here on The Island we always say our precious animals go to the Happy Hunting Grounds, where there is no more pain. The fawns gambol round the lions and the eagles sit in the trees with the cats and the owls doze with the mice. All is peace and St. Francis visits every day to see them.
You over The Pond introduced me to The Rainbow Bridge and I think it is a lovely and comforting belief that our chow chows cross the Rainbow Bridge to get to the Happy Hunting Grounds.
When the hurt gets less, and it will, please remember the words of that lovely old Hebrew proverb:-
Say not in grief she is no more but in thankfulness she was.
It will get better, I promise only it does not seem like that now.
(Thank you Sweetpea for my new banner.)
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Ferretchik
- Rank 0
- Posts: 1
- Joined: Sun May 01, 2011 11:37 am
Re: Help with Grief
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....
Author unknown...
You loved Lexi in life and comforted her in death. I am so sorry for your loss.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....
Author unknown...
You loved Lexi in life and comforted her in death. I am so sorry for your loss.
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Re: Help with Grief
hi
I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. Just try to remember the happy times you shared and what a lovely long life you gave to your Chow. Be gentle and kind to yourself. Hugs to you.
Michelle x
I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. Just try to remember the happy times you shared and what a lovely long life you gave to your Chow. Be gentle and kind to yourself. Hugs to you.
Michelle x
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Victory
- Rank 3
- Posts: 3658
- Joined: Thu Mar 03, 2005 7:03 am
- Location: North Chesterfield, (Right outside Richmond) Virginia
Re: Help with Grief
My very deepest condolences on your loss. She was with you a long time. Like Judy said, cry when you need to and remember the good times, the tears will eventually stop, the memories will be yours forever.
Victory, Darkwind, (our angel), Firesong, and Dreamdancer
Thank you SweetPea!
Thank you SweetPea!
Re: Help with Grief
Thanks everyone for the kind words. I am trying my best to dwell on all of the great years. It is tough and I know there is not easy answer. Lexi brought a lot of joy into my life and right now it just feels so empty. It has been one week since she passed away and I just try to stay busy.
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Tippsy'smom
/chow-avatar-0330.jpg)
- Rank 3
- Posts: 3123
- Joined: Tue Oct 03, 2006 7:28 am
- Location: McDonough, GA
Re: Help with Grief
I'm so sorry for your loss. :'(
Rest in peace Lexi!
I lost my 10 year old girl, Tippsy, Tuesday of last week, and I KNOW the pain you're feeling.
Rest in peace Lexi!
I lost my 10 year old girl, Tippsy, Tuesday of last week, and I KNOW the pain you're feeling.
Jess
R.I.P. Cinder~1992-1994, Tippsy~9/00-4/11, Jasper~10/08-10/14, Todd~2/11-7/15
Dixie: mix Rebel: mix
R.I.P. Cinder~1992-1994, Tippsy~9/00-4/11, Jasper~10/08-10/14, Todd~2/11-7/15
Dixie: mix Rebel: mix
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bluelotusheart
- Rank 0
- Posts: 23
- Joined: Wed Oct 08, 2008 1:23 pm
Re: Help with Grief
I am so sorry for your loss! Hang in there...your baby will always be in your heart just not physically there! I have gone through this way too many times, know how you are feeling...cherish the memories.
Bluelotusheart
Re: Help with Grief
I am sorry to here your news were going through the same as well.Me,zeus and achilles have just lost charlie the cairn terrier.All three of us are missing her so much.Shes the fifth one i have lost and in the first few weeks there isnt anything that anyone can say to you to take the pain away.But you have been given very good advice on here just go with your emotions.Just think about the good times you had together and smile and when the tears come let them.
I
I
Re: Help with Grief
What a wonderful long life your Lexi had! I know it hurts terribly, and like everyone has said, the hurt will lessen as time goes by, and you will remember all the good times and love you shared. Godspeed, dearest Lexi...
CoraP.
Remember this, and also be persuaded of its truth - the future is not in the hands of fate, but in ourselves.
Jules Jusserand
Remember this, and also be persuaded of its truth - the future is not in the hands of fate, but in ourselves.
Jules Jusserand
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lovechows55
- Rank 0
- Posts: 56
- Joined: Thu Sep 13, 2007 5:49 pm
- Location: Fullerton, CA
Re: Help with Grief
Rodney,
I am so sorry to hear about your beloved Lexi. As others have already said, the loss of a chow takes time to heal and the only way to feel better is to let yourself go through the process of grieving. We lost our chow chow Chelsea after having her for almost 15 1/2 hears in January 2008. The first weeks were the worst; first year still difficult but with time, her loss did get a little easier. I still miss her every single day and there are still times when I still cry for her but that's the price I'm happy to pay for having such a wonderful companion all of those years.
A couple things that helped me cope with our loss were a great pet loss website (www.petloss.com) which has a Monday night candle ceremony where people from all over the world gather together to help heal each other. That site has a great deal of information about how to work through the loss of a pet, including other resources, and you can also write a tribute to Lexi on it. Also, writing a tribute to Lexi here can be helpful--when you're ready.
Another thing you might want to consider is putting together an album of photos and/or having a pet portrait done. My husband had a portrait made for me by a great artist who is based in CA and I have it sitting on my dresser so it's the first and last thing I see every day. If you'd like the artist's contact information, feel free to pm.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Barbara
I am so sorry to hear about your beloved Lexi. As others have already said, the loss of a chow takes time to heal and the only way to feel better is to let yourself go through the process of grieving. We lost our chow chow Chelsea after having her for almost 15 1/2 hears in January 2008. The first weeks were the worst; first year still difficult but with time, her loss did get a little easier. I still miss her every single day and there are still times when I still cry for her but that's the price I'm happy to pay for having such a wonderful companion all of those years.
A couple things that helped me cope with our loss were a great pet loss website (www.petloss.com) which has a Monday night candle ceremony where people from all over the world gather together to help heal each other. That site has a great deal of information about how to work through the loss of a pet, including other resources, and you can also write a tribute to Lexi on it. Also, writing a tribute to Lexi here can be helpful--when you're ready.
Another thing you might want to consider is putting together an album of photos and/or having a pet portrait done. My husband had a portrait made for me by a great artist who is based in CA and I have it sitting on my dresser so it's the first and last thing I see every day. If you'd like the artist's contact information, feel free to pm.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Barbara